I’d like to apologize in advance for any days sans post this month. It will be largely due to the fact that we’re moving!! This time, it’s to a bigger apartment that’s closer to the beach. Hooray!
I’d like take this opportunity to examine why it is that we’re moving for the third time in two years. For myself, I believe I have a strong yearning for constant change. As a young women approaching thirty, I somehow find stability in instability. I can always count on the morning and my birthday and the traffic on the I-5. With all these guarantees, it’s refreshing to experience something new.
Now I realize that our continuous signing of new leases may seem slightly nomadic to some. Even I sometimes find it a bit unsettling to be so, well, unsettled. But the truth is that at this time in my life, I’m on a mission. A mission to grow and learn and experience new people and places and eccentric ideas. If I stay in one place, life starts to feel a little like another day at Granny’s. You know what I mean. If everyday I’m waking up and going to work and coming home and cooking for John…I might as well just throw a rocker on the porch and call it a rap. Granted I’ll be partaking in these normal daily activities wherever I live, but now in the interim I have a new nest to lay sticks in, new walls to cover, new windows to treat. Outside my door there will be a new neighborhood to discover and people to meet. Just thinking about it gets me giddy.
Change means new opportunity and a charge of excitement to get out there and be everything I can be. Perhaps there’s some dysfunction in my inability to walk out of the same bedroom, into the same apartment, in the same neighborhood for more than 500 days. (Just writing about it sounds mundane). Or, perhaps, I just haven’t found the place to really call home yet. I think it’s more in the latter.
I have always been one who listens to her instincts. Granted, I may toil over the details, but in the end it’s usually gut – two, mind – zero. So today my gut is telling me to get the hell out of dodge, again, and see what else is out there. And as I set forth, other wanderers following the breeze will find themselves waking up in my old bedrooms past, and filling those fridges with their favorite delights, and staring at the wall in the kitchen wondering, “How did that crack get there?” (shhh) It makes me feel part of the grand continuum of things.
In truth, I’m like a hermit crab. In order to grow, I must leave my shell for a more suitable fit. I’m not quite sure how I ended up this way. It’s just in my nature, I guess.
Some people are more like coral. They have the ability to stay put and thrive, adding to the aesthetic and harmony of a place. One day, I too may find a spot where I can settle down and still grow.
I believe there is a neighborhood out there somewhere that I will for the rest of my days call home. I’m not sure what town it’s in, or what county, or even what state, and I certainly don’t know when I will end up there. But I know it’s a happy place. For now, I’m content just traveling along, finding new reefs and beaches to explore.