Happy Monday, and Happy Spring!
We made it! Another Winter has passed us by. For me personally, this Winter seemed mild. Perhaps it was for you too. Then again, I still spent a lot of time in my own form of mental and physical hibernation. That’s certainly appropriate for Winter, and I’m grateful for the opportunities to rest and reflect when I need it. And though I sense a deep longing for Summer, there remains a reluctance to reemerge. Perhaps, I’ve grown too comfortable in my cave. But the Seasons still change whether we are ready or not. Just as life continues regardless of our thoughts about it. It makes me question where else in my life might I be resisting change.
I recently attended a memorial service and the priest spoke of loss and the birth of a child. He said when a child is to be born the family is so excited. It’s a great gain for their lives. But to the child, a great loss comes with its birth. The loss of warmth and comfort. The calming sound of their mother’s heartbeat. The rocking movements that carry them into the beginning of their existence. Of everything they know and grew accustomed to. When they enter this world, everything changes and that world disappears. And so it must. The child cannot go on living forever in their mother’s womb. In order to enter into their life experience, they must leave that space behind. It’s the only way for them to grow.
This truth continues throughout our lives. As children, we experience the discomfort of loss again and again. Our parents dropping us off at school. The school year ending. Moving away from home. But we do it, partly because we have to, but also because as children and young adults, we’re excited about life. We have hope and believe in the possibilities that exist in the world for us. The growth that comes with change is apparent.
As we get older it seems to become more difficult to imagine and embrace the possibilities that come with change. We’ve got more responsibilities and undoubtedly more fears. We grow comfortable in what already exists, even if our current state brings us more stress or pain. The fear of the unknown, of the discomfort that comes with change, shrouds the hope for beautiful possibilities.
I’ve been witness to this fear recently. I’ve experienced it myself as well. I’ve seen great sadness and turmoil come from this fear. But when someone surrenders to it and opens their heart to change, I’ve also seen great things come in its wake. I’ve watched people enter deeper into the present moment and lean into their feelings and I’ve watched them reemerge lighter and with more clarity. When we learn to release the fear, we let go of the pain it’s causing and we open ourselves up to healing, to rebirth, to possibility.
And what I’ve come to experience, and maybe you know this to be true as well, is that the fear of loss often causes a much greater pain in my life than the loss itself. Because when I’m living in fear, all I see is the pain I think it will cause. Not the healing. Not the growth. Not even the real feelings I might have about it. Only doubt and regret – and very little good ever comes from feeling like that. All it creates is stagnancy.
And unfortunately, life doesn’t really care whether we stay put or move forward. It will still keep moving through the Seasons, keep giving and taking, shifting and changing. And those around us will keep coming and going in whatever space they have grown into for themselves. It will all continue whether we choose to participate or not. Unlike the baby in the womb, we do have a choice in the matter. So which choice will you make?
If staying put a little longer is what feels right for you, that’s ok. Sometimes we need to take things at our own pace. But if you know in your heart that there is more for you to experience, then what are you waiting for? Don’t let fear take the reins. And when it does, just come back to the breath. Close your eyes and surrender to the moment. Remember that you are still here and that everything is ok. Regardless of the stories your mind is telling you, you are still a being in the universe. And you’ve been given the same potential for mental and physical growth and change as any other being in the universe, whether it’s for the next 45 minutes or the next 45 years.
So, as we enter into this new Spring season, give yourself the opportunity to explore the space around you. Lean into your feelings. Recognize the discomfort. Be honest with yourself about your dreams and desires. And remember that no growth comes without some form of loss. And loss can be just as much of a reminder of love and life as birth is.
“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”
~ Lao Tzu
Have a beautiful week. Love of lots!
Bye for now!